I would be lying if I said I am fine. My heart aches and the tears have come. Grief over many things in life right now seems to be my enemy. As I laid awake last night, I had a new thought. What if my pain became my friend?
What if my pain became my friend?
Yes…I long for a day where there is no pain, but in the here and now it will always be present. Instead of fighting it, wishing it wasn’t so, or praying that God would make it disappear, what if I accepted it. I would carry it with me wherever I went. I am not suggesting we stop seeking healing and help. I am actually suggesting the quite opposite! When we allow our pain to be our friend we admit it is present. We allow God to preform miracles within us one step at a time.
Paul asked God three times to take the thorn from his flesh. God replies, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (2 Corinthians 12:9). Jesus prayed that he would not have to suffer his horrific death by asking God to take this cup from him. The cup was not taken from him, but God strengthened him to endure the pain (Luke 22:42-43). I believe God is teaching us something here. I will admit this is not easy for me to swallow, and for a long time in my grief this made me angry at God. The more I walk with God in my pain, in the wilderness, I find hope.
Today, I am thankful for an early morning with a good cup of coffee and a creative atmosphere. Here, I will invite my pain to be my friend. I will accept what is hard, grieve it, and pray for God’s endurance. I will pray that He will show up for me in my pain. How can you make your pain your friend today?
Practical Step: How did I do this? I wrote a list of all the things that were causing me pain. I prayed and sat with each one of them in God’s presence. I allowed myself to grieve and feel what I needed to feel. I didn’t frantically ask God to take it away in a panic (like I often do). Instead, I prayed that I would own it and that God would help me carry it with Him.